I am the smoke of a Mannikin burnt

Free. Free at last

Cool waters
imprisoned mass of colouration
say fie now-
sediment, syringe of my Elixir.
Fie! Laugh you now
the life is drawn
to drinking state of Christos?

I left your immobility
with the sigh
of my becoming.

Whose reason called
the crack of dawn my death?

Shadow barren of my love
keep the silver of that
State spend it
on the flowers of your grave.

after calling Solomon to testify himself
keep your hammer
inside your sarcophagus.

I remember roses
imitations of the fire reflecting
on the cheeks
my last winter’s face
crinkled with the onward coming

that my lazy legs were faults
of not attending church
saw my Book
the dog-eared blotted one

but even then

the coin of sailors slang would gutter
sing the spit of my petulance
leave me
shrunk a little more to child.

And the roses I remember
from the fire
were the devil shadows beckoning.

Now I see you muted shell
as the illusion of my living

Lie mirror!

I, the silver of your backing
leave you transparent.
You cannot fix my soul
or image me in time.

Bubble -you have burst
Fie! Fie!
I am in sight of no horizons
I am the Minister

and I

Am the Ministry.

The Price of Fish

Pray hard for the men who hunt the deep sea
in their cockleshell boats out of Clyde
who scour the cold swims of Poseidon’s green head
filling iced holds with dead alive-eyes.
Where the North wind screech is God’s
angered ethereal Hand, and fear
is the shake of worn riveted plate and
Love is a church locked up on the land.

Elemental wind do not keep them from shore
They who dare open the water blue door.

Pray strong for men who haunt the cod swims
Hymned only by the white garish moon
and wind-snatched callings of seabirds scorning.
Skins scolded eyes shrunk in the Arctic blast
laughing as the pawls judder and grind
heaving the trawl, engine complaining.
Who love the deep sea with a savagery
spit, swear, and piss in the lee.

Elemental wind do not rage for their souls
their fathers have paid the fish stealing tolls.

Pray love for the sons of water and blood,
patient for the calm, eager to net
and ever ready to chase the white fish
over mountainous crests, under
the pale dark bruising wet sky.
Casting net to web Gods’ octopus head
clawing the fish from his shivering throat,
their lives threatened by the weight of the prize.

Elemental wind, do not anger the sea
Man and his mistress must ever be free.


Ghosts in Breakers Creek

In muddy mouthed Portsea Creek unwatched
forgotten ships lay beached and breathless,
dashed and smashed cut and bled, weather
beaten, picked and broken by the dockside
stooping crane’s bill collecting scrap.

Their final journeys over shallows dragging
barnacle crusted bottoms over shingle
groaned past the red flagged gunnery range,
pulled and pushed by impatient tugs, aware
falling tides and sucking mud claim victims.

Robbed by landsman, written out of registers,
church empty bridges balefully glistening glare
untold stories of once purposed lives, men
who swore repeatedly like lovers on heat,
trumpeting the union of engine and steel.

Now their ghosts can be heard in the small
of the night blowing base horns, heaving
anchors, turning their screws seaward,
reliving purpose, blending rusted hulls
to the sea and the never ending sky.

© TonyAshenden

Poetry is addictive

If you are not already aware -be warned, writing poetry is addictive. You may like me have other writing skills prose-like, non-fiction, fiction, or faction. If you get hooked on writing a poem, in your heart of hearts you know you cannot finish it until it’s a work of art -that means every word must count, they must be the right words, and the poem must be more than words alone convey.

It’s addictive because we can never be sure we have achieved, not only birthed but given long life to the piece.

In many years of ‘garret writing’ there’s one difficult lesson which must be learnt, that is -don’t file it in the pending tray, publish the damn thing, because art is an evolutionary process. Pieces do not mature into art if they remain stuck in your mind. The blank sheet of paper is only terrifying when the mind is still hosting ‘unfinished’ poems.

After you post it’s gone from your mind -later perhaps you might unpublish and rework. My experience tells me the piece gets better, and ….. and ….. it might also be unworkable -possibly a work of art!

A Stumble in Time

Pickle-black stream a-tumble under moon

Spume spatters night, the pickle-black stream
a-tumble under moon, is whispering loud
between lichen-stained stones, hissing
about ruin of Man as it hastens to sea.

The clouds uncover a star mantled crescent
illuminate a petrified gauntlet of stone
pickle brown scars etched in yellow
shape fingers grasping an invisible hilt.

All about my better body shadows dance
thick-like bracken wracked by wind.
I hear clattering hooves, sprays of flint shard
see a thundering mass of muscle and blood,

flanks creaming red, a horse and rider
a force on the run. I can feel the hurt
labouring breath know her last service
hastens in the dark to this musical place.

Astride her saddled brave heart,
helmeted, metal shorn, steel spurred,
a wounded warrior is breathing his last
eyes bright and fixed on safe haven.

A mortal wound bloodies the cross
of his surcoat, a lance haft splintered
is sunk deep to the thigh; yet he rides
as if ready to battle the Christian foe.

Left hand fists the bridle, the right
grips a sword pointing to earth.
It is the horse that gives way
her heart bursts as she stumbles,

the stream too wide too deep too dark.
The rider thrown lies broken on horns
of veined rock, eyes fixed to the sky,
his cape now a shred of dark shadow.

The last laboured breath of his charger
is taken by the stream and moves on
reborn in the song sung by the stones
eternally free of saddle and rider.

Stillness has swallowed the warrior’s fire
high flies his purpose, body-less at last,
soul-like beyond sky bowl of stars
seeking the grail of everlasting life.

And I stumble in time, unsure
If my better body is the breath of life
part drawn to the moon part to the stream
transforming, dividing, living a dream.

© TonyAshenden

The Fragrant Airs of Heaven

Idyllic loves’ creation is
imagined lilac groves
air enchanting havens
of scented flowers
lifting to the harvest moon.

This world we may not enter
until this earthen road is ended,
yet we may store good efforts seed
do right as God’s creators.

Unbending onward to the light
holding to heart loves’ first vow,
that we unseasoned Spirits
shall by all intentions be
tried and tested
and found well.

B for Pope Boniface VIII

What makes this man remarkable is not his systemising of Catholic Canon Law, or founding the University of Rome, or formalising the custom of the Roman Jubilee, a special year of remission of sins and universal pardon, but by being remembered in Dante’s Divine Comedy as public enemy number one!

Born Benedetto Caetani, Pope Boniface has the unenviable notoriety of being named in Dante’s Inferno as an exponent of the black arts. He succeeded to Pope Celestine V to the papacy in 1294 and put forward some of the strongest claims of any pope to temporal as well as spiritual power. He involved himself often with foreign affairs, including in France, Sicily, Italy, and the First War of Scottish Independence. These views, and his chronic intervention in “temporal” affairs, led to many bitter quarrels with Albert I of Germany, Philip IV of France, and Dante Alighieri, who wrote his treatise De Monarchia to dispute Boniface’s claims of papal supremacy and placed the pope in the Eighth Circle of Hell in his Divine Comedy, among the simoniacs, i.e. those who sold church roles and sacred objects to empower them with the power of the Holy Spirit by the laying on of hands.
Boniface issued a bull in 1303 declaring both spiritual and temporal power were under the pope’s jurisdiction, and kings were subordinate to the power of the Roman pontiff. Philip disobeyed and had the bull publicly burnt in Paris in 1302. Boniface excommunicated Philip and all others who prevented French clergy from traveling to the Holy See, after which the king sent his troops to attack the pope’s residence in Anagni on 7 September 1303 and capture him. Boniface was held for three days and beaten badly and died from a fever a month later.
His successor Benedict VI undertook to defend his memory but died in the first year of his pontificate -it was said by poison, and the Holy See remained vacant for 11 months, when a Frenchman, the archbishop of Bordeaux was elected to the papal chair under the title of Clement V. There is little doubt he was Phillip’s choice who then pressured Clement V to stage a posthumous trial of Boniface, accusing him of heresy and sodomy. The Pope referred the process to the 1311 Council of Vienne, where two Templar knights challenged the claim to a trial by combat. With no one willing to fight them, the Council declared the matter closed. Boniface’s body was accidentally exhumed in 1605 and was found to be in relatively good condition, dispensing the legend that he had become frenzied, gnawing his hands, and bashing his brains out against the wall.
The French case against Boniface involved many testimonies, which described Boniface as a free thinker, in the habit of mocking, and cynically regarding things sacred to the church, of practising the black arts. It was commonly reported in Italy, according to witnesses, Boniface had communication with and worshipped demons. One, a friar, brother Bernard de Sorano, said that when Boniface was a cardinal and held the office of notary to Nicholas III, he lay with the papal army before the castle of Puraino, and he having been sent to receive the surrender of the castle returned with the cardinal to Viterbo, where they were lodged in the palace. At night looking out of the window with the cardinal’s chamberlain they saw Boniface enter an adjoining garden, where in a mysterious manner, carrying a cock and an earthen pot he made a circle about himself on the ground with a sword. On seating himself therein he created a fire in the pot and killed the cock sprinkling its blood on the fire causing much smoke. He proceeded to read from a book conjuring up demons during which much noise was heard that made them terrified. One voice clearly heard said “Give us our share”. After this ceremony Boniface returned to his room which he slept in alone, but he was heard talking all night and strange voices answering him.
Eventually under pressure to consider ‘other necessities’ Philip IV agreed to drop the prosecution, and at last, in 1312, Boniface was declared in the Council of Vienne, innocent of all the offences he had been charged.
Make of this as you will, fundamentalists, monarchs, and politicians during the middle ages often said there was no smoke without fire. Boniface VIII has not been alone accused of heresy, and that includes the present Pope Francis (2013 -) whose words and actions have been said to be a comprehensive rejection of Catholic teachings on marriage and sexual activity, on the moral law, and on grace and forgiveness of sins. The pontiff has even been accused of using a satanic symbol at the opening mass of the Synod on Youth in 2018, when he “carried a staff in the form of a ‘stang,’ an object used in satanic rituals”.

Actions to blend Body & Soul

Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

There’s two kinds of good news we should talk about. Firstly, for those who fear for their children and grandchildren, antibodies are on their way. If you look back in history at the many health scourges decimating communities you will see we have, in the main, developed immunity from those viral problems. There’s no reason to suggest Covid-19 is any different, over one or two generations immunity will be significantly higher. The other bit of good news is you can prevent it becoming a serious problem NOW.

Greetings! This is the last of my weekly emails sent since lockdown began, and it’s week 16. Who would have believed that when all this kicked off in the UK in March? The numerology number 16 resonates with wisdom, independence, and family, is also a number of introspection. It’s wise, intuitive, and tends to be independent, is both spiritual and analytical, a philosopher with sound arguments. Values which I’m sure you would aspire to and quite possibly claim as practise. The news gives us some heads up reports of good sense and inspirational works, but as you would expect not everyone is being sensible or caring for others -so nationally it can’t be said we are living up to all the values the number 16 promotes. The difficulties we are contending with as the lockdown eases can be broadly described as two kinds; people who feel the current restrictions should be lifted, and those who remain fearful viral contamination will continue to spread.
There’s no getting away from the fact Covid-19 is a devastating illness for some with long term effects if they survive it. Whilst we are learning by the day about this virus and work to produce vaccines is intense we still do not have controls we can be sure will eliminate contamination. Some people, perhaps even the majority of population, are asymptomatic, which can mean some are presymptomatic, others don’t show any symptoms at all, and some are immune to the virus. What this means the reported number of cases (which can never represent accurately all who are positive at any one time) is misleading causing people to believe it’s a greater health risk than it actually is, and the recognizable symptoms in elderly and vulnerable who sadly have lost their lives doesn’t necessarily mean they did die of the virus. And given the production of effective vaccines can you expect anyone to stand up and proclaim the death of this virus? I doubt it -I very much doubt it. Why? Covid-19 is a living organism, its predecessors are SARS and MERS, both respiratory infections, the former originating in China and the latter in the Middle East.
Currently 11.6 million people have been confirmed Covid-19 worldwide, of which less than 5% have reportedly died from it. In the UK deaths are estimated at 15%. This makes uncomfortable reading but the percentage of deaths is derived from confirmed positive readings -do not include the asymptomatic or presymptomatic population that haven’t been tested or tested unconfirmed. As pandemics go we are way short of the devastating 1918 influenza pandemic, known as Spanish Flu (said to be transmitted to humans from birds) of which an estimated 500 million people, one third of the world population, had it and from which 10% died.
You must know me by now -I don’t paint dark depressing pictures without suggesting to you where there is light. There’s two kinds of good news we should talk about. Firstly, for those who fear for their children and grandchildren, antibodies are on their way. If you look back in history at the many health scourges decimating communities you will see we have, in the main, developed immunity from those viral problems. There’s no reason to suggest Covid-19 is any different, over one or two generations immunity will be significantly higher. The other bit of good news is you can prevent it becoming a serious problem NOW.
This is not new news from me, but it’s worth repeating as this is my last email on the lockdown phenomenon. Strengthen your immune system! The powers-that-be and any business coercing you to part with cash who promote practices and products to strengthen the immune system will caveat their statements and claims by denying they can protect you from developing Covid-19. This protect your backside attitude weakens the vital importance of good practise and healthy intake of foods and supplements. As you get older the immune system is said to weaken -and yes it does for the vast majority, but tell that to the 100 year old who is still having a daily dram, smokes occasionally and can still appreciate the difference between the sexes, and they will tell you to stop stressing about it! Of course some people are genetically stronger than others, can abuse their body and still not suffer as others might. What has to be understood here is immunity is not managed and strengthened only by what you eat or the frequency of physical exercise, or by medicines -it is directed by the mind.
Take the man or woman who works routinely the adult period of life. They will undergo all kinds of stresses and changes and they overcome them because they have reason to get up and work the following day. No longer wanted? Physically no longer strong enough? Bright, eager younger people ready to do better than you? They retire (wanting to or not) and major changes begin to take place. They have a choice when to get up in the morning and soon find that life now if full of choices. Sounds good doesn’t it -but no its not all good. The physical body is very adaptable, not only can it make changes in a relatively short period of time, it can also turn nasty stuff into good stuff or get rid of it without affecting its functions, but what it must be able to do is cycle and reinvent itself on a daily basis. People who have purpose to get up in the morning, have desire to accomplish, improve and develop their interests will routinely afford the body the cyclical order of change it requires to reinvent itself. And that is the bottom line to building immunity strength and responsiveness.
In my blog I invite you to follow I’ll give tricks and tips on how to build immunity strength -it’s not enough to protest and stubbornly refuse giving in to illness, positive do’s are what strengthen, the feel-good factor. The use of face masks has had a mixed press, but currently the Government is ruling they must be worn in clinical and care environs and also on public transport and whenever one metre distancing cannot be maintained, and there’s serious talk about increased use of masks in shops. Whilst there are practices in environs where wearing masks is the only option available to protect against the virus, unless the mask is close fitting and breathing is through a filter, masks are not 100% effective. Breath enters the nose and mouth from the sides as well as through the porous nature of the mask material and the enclosure becomes humid, thereby attracting airborne viral infections when you breathe. The use of oil on hands and face, including up the nostrils is in my view much more effective. I personally use coconut oil because research shows it breaks up the virus envelope and inhibits the maturation stage of development -this has the same effect as soapy water, but do keep in mind that some soaps aren’t oily, which is also true of many hand sanitizers. As a matter of course when it is necessary to put on protection, on returning to a safe environment wash thoroughly. It may surprise you to see how dirty the water is after washing -just goes to show the oil does protect the skin and how unclean the air is!

The poem I’ve included for this last week is an echo of purpose and work, actions that blend the body with the soul -I hope you like it.

Love’s Weaver

The weaver bending arms of twisted knotted yarns
serves the loom and the loom a pattern makes.
And bent upon the stool, his eyes direct upon the thread
between weft and weave, his vision skips.

The shuttle smooth moves through the shed
to the clack of treadles pressed;
feeling more than seeing, every bone reactive
To the rise and falling weaving shafts.

The sun arcs through the window overhead
dying unnoticed in the west and in the cool
unseen light of night, clouds arise to hide the stars.
Bobbins twirling empty are replaced.

He labours not for kudos or for rates.
As every yarn entwines it speaks;
heddle and treadle selecting straighten out
and the loom alive a drumming music makes.

Star and sun dance light within his bobbing head;
the weavers’ needs are met and the soul unfurls.
Love that has a thousand-silent sounding ee’s
Spins on to weave for all eternity.

A for Abraham the Jew

Turn the “A” upside down and you’ll have a good sense of its original shape and meaning when it was introduced around 1800 BC. Resembling an animal’s head with antlers or horns, the original meaning of the letter in ancient Semitic was “ox.”

Abraham the Jew (Alchemist, magician, and philosopher) was born 1362 in Mayence, Germany. His father was reputed to be a seer and the son’s education would have begun at an early age, later studying under Moses, who Abraham describes as a good man, but entirely ignorant of the True Mystery, and of Veritable Magic. Yet still a young man he began travels, Hungary, Austria, Greece, then to Constantinople where he remained for two years -next moving on into Arabia, in those days a veritable centre of mystical learning, onward into Palestine, and Egypt. Here he made acquaintance with Abra-Melin, the famous Egyptian philosopher who, besides entrusting him with certain documents, confided in him by word of mouth a number of invaluable secrets. He returned to Europe eventually settling in Wurzburg, Germany, where he married and raised a family. He espoused two sons and three daughters. The dowry he gave on all three daughters were sums of 100’000 golden florins -in medieval times a fortune, and in today’s money £11,412,800. He claims to have gained these fortunes and more by travelling as an alchemist and magician. He certainly won great fame during his lifetime, being summoned to perform acts of magic by rich and influential people, notably the Emperor Sigismund of Germany, the Bishop of Wurzburg, King Henry VI, Duke of Bavaria, and Pope John XXIII. Abraham’s career is shrouded in mystery, even the date of his death is uncertain, commonly supposed to have occurred about 1460.

What we know of him comes from a curious manuscript, originally lodged in the archives of the Bibliotheque de l ’Arsenal in Paris and subsequently published in 1760 by Abraham Eleazar as ‘A Very Ancient Alchemical Work’ -likely not his real name.  https://www.amazon.co.uk/Book-Abraham-Jew-R-M-S/dp/1511667168

The original manuscript was entitled, ‘The Book of the Sacred Magic of Abra-Melin, as delivered by Abraham the Jew unto his son Lamech’. The first part is a record of his travels in search of wisdom, the second and third parts are based on the documents which the Egyptian sage gave to Abraham, the principles of Magic, and the practise of Magic. Later chapters cover such subjects as developing clairvoyance, how to retain familiar spirits, bound or free, how to excite tempests, raise the dead, change shape and form, thaumaturgic healing of leprosy, dropsy, paralysis, fevers, and sea sickness. His penultimate chapter is entitled ‘How to cause armed men to appear’. It is by seership and the evocation of Kabbalistic Squares that such magic can be achieved. If you would like to know more about what Kabbalistic Squares are, this commentary could prove helpful, http://www.ismaili.net/mirrors/Ikhwan_08/magic_squares.html

What we know of his character comes from this document, written partly in Latin, Arabian, Chaldee, and Syriac language. It shows that Abraham was a man of strong beliefs entirely dedicated to occult knowledge, didactic in his language, and a person who would not suffer fools gladly.

Cardinal Richelieu (1585-1642) is believed to have had copy of this manuscript -now the question for you is this. Given such famous people solicited his services and he was never (apparently) short of a penny, can you believe in his powers? Is it possibly true he was a practitioner of knowledge we can no longer access or understand?

In numerology the letter A in his name signifies Life tends to be approached with ambition and drive, pursued with confidence. Courage tends to be valued. The person tends to express willpower and purpose.

Independence of a kind….

Now let me see… how can I interpret these rules, feel my freedom, but not break them?

Here we are in week 15 of the lockdown with independence day approaching. The number 15 creates its own rules to accomplish harmony, and I guess you can acknowledge some are already creating their own rules, if crowded beaches, street parties, and football supporters celebrations are anything to go by. This number is also about personal responsibility, home and family, and many are now meeting up for the first time since restrictions were imposed. The 15 essence includes health, healing, and domestic activity. Love, beauty, and comfort are important, but the family is most important of all. 15’s energy contains a maternalism that extends beyond the immediate family to neighbors and visitors -it’s a caretaker. The number also has a sense of adventure and a versatile wit. And there’s a determination to express all of one’s own existence, which leads me to question what we mean by the ‘new normal’.
Outwardly, the new normal will be recognizable by the wearing of masks, social distancing, and meeting restrictions on the one hand, and increasing traffic and noise on the other. Inwardly it’s a different ball game. Last week I was talking about habits and how the loss of routines have affected our we are functioning on a day to day level and fearful of change as the lockdown eases. The UK is about to get its own version of Independence day celebrations -and lets be fair, some positively good vibrations being released into our communities. Anticipation to regenerate some of those habits and routines…. But what has been happening inwardly to change our expectations, desires, and needs?
We’ve had more time on our hands, and whilst it’s true to have caused a process of rethinking priorities, it has more positively created ‘spaces’ in the personality mind, which in turn have been filled by desires (and hopefully needs), we haven’t allowed focus on in our otherwise busy lives. For some that will be creative expressions -anything from garden care, home décor, to expressions of crafts and arts. For others, the so-called rethink will be looking at interests, personal or work, in a different way than hitherto. Many people have been remembering their dreams, which can be a mix of unsettling ‘events’ and strange inexplicable images that stimulate or make one fearful. Then there is the lack of practice fear -can you do the same or better than before, or will your nerves jangle with a feeling of emptiness as you prepare to get back to some kind of normality?
If we look closer at the number 15, we see that it’s associated with the 15th card of the Tarot, which many believe to be the most negative card in the deck. The Devil is associated primarily with sensuality and ego (remember Lucifer wanted the other angels to worship him instead of God). However the card is more about change -karmic change. The antidote to excessive ego characteristics is inherent in the 15th number of the I Ching, usually translated as Humility or Modesty. Commenting on this oracle, Confucius says: “The Superior Person takes from where there is too much and augments what is too little. That way all things are apportioned correctly.” This refers to keeping a sense of mindfulness and balance over all of life’s situations.
So, given we have inwardly changed, no matter how the new normal looks like a return to the previously known ways -it won’t be. Our priorities will be different, subtly so in many instances but there will be moments when we herald change and show a new face to the world, be they in personal or workaday living.
History shows us there have been numerous pandemics, some very recent which have not consciously intruded into your day to day life, others of such magnitude and loss of life, to make Covid-19 look minor. What happens as a result of these traumatic changes, and that also includes the horrors of war, is the psyche in all of us individually undergoes fundamental changes. These changes will not consciously manifest overnight, but they will surface nonetheless. We can expect even in the local environment of our lives changes that will be embedded into our futures.
The poem I’ve written for you this week is about time sort of standing still, and how that can make us inwardly aware we cannot truly possess or determine how life and love shapes our souls.

The Seize of Time

Walk with me through the green gate
past the ivy clad barn, the rusted plough,
there let us take shade from the sun
under the spread of the sycamore tree.
Nearby, the gnats cloud the sedge pond

buzz in harmony, chicken’s coop,
geese cackle, and the farm dog barks.
The clack of a hand-turned butter churn
can be heard from the house, the smell
of baking bread wafts in the breeze.

In the far wet-field, revs of a tractor
sound as we sit midst forget-me-not’s,
coriander, dandelion, thistles, and
milkwort, mosses, and warm grass.
Laughing, and making daisy chains.

Out of sight beyond the fields
a distant bell toll seizes time.
Moments that will never age
forever live –of love’s breath
that never shall or can possess.

My thanks to replies I receive -and everyone I reply too. The intention to recover and make a better world is a theme most often central to emails I receive. Stay healthy and you will stay safe. As always I include a link for the self-healing recording, feel free to pass it around to whomever you wish. https://www.holistichealthuk.co.uk/guided_self_healing_cd.php

This is the UK lockdown profile of weeks. First published on email 300620

Something is happening here and you don’t know what it is, do you….. ?

Can you think your way of this?

Age is said rightly to be a state of mind and how that affects a person depends on a number of factors. The word currently in fashion linked to age during this viral pandemic is the word vulnerable -mostly applied to people of 70 or over, and as you know people can’t be ‘boxed’ like that. If like myself you don’t have any underlying health conditions you will reject the label. You will also know some people seem to age more noticeably than others. Traumatic events can age a person as can underlying health conditions and long term illnesses, but the issue that dominates the rate of aging is not physical impairment, it is -in a word; need. By and large when we are children we are wanted and loved, and even when sadly that is not the case our mental and emotional nature is stimulated by the newness of environment -the rate of change. As adults we get to be more selective of what we want and how we are loved. So far so good -the rate of change may be characterised differently but ambition and desires still engage with others who reciprocate and fulfil what we are pleased to call need, ‘but something is happening here  and you don’t know what it is, do you, Mr. Jones?’

That’s the refrain in Bob Dylan’s song ‘Ballad of a Thin Man’, is a question which I think succinctly encapsulates the state of mind that causes ageing. We confuse want with need -think they are the same, or to put it another way, when you get what you want you satisfy need. People suffer physically and mentally, and expire before their allotted lifespan runs its course when they are not needed. For example, a person sees their worth in the employment they have and when retirement is forced upon them, they don’t feel needed anymore. Result? Health problems etc. etcetera. A marriage gets into difficulties -maybe they part, maybe not, but the outcome is need-less. Problems ensue, depression, anxiety, anger, suppression of feelings. At the other end of the ‘scale’, after a long happy marriage one partner dies, the surviving spouse doesn’t feel there is anything to live for -they no longer feel wanted. A mother sees her son grow up and the woman he marries doesn’t like her -she copes with that, but when a grandchild arrives its mother refuses access -all of a sudden the grandmother feels unwanted -feels that her purpose has come to an end.

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            I’ve no doubt you could frame a few examples that have these kinds of outcomes. Let me be clear I’m not saying you shouldn’t develop satisfaction from an employment or business, or that you shouldn’t put value to human relationships -what I am saying is that wants are the cause of all and every kind of attachment we have in this life and sometimes (as per my examples) these attachments are broken or cease to manifest. Need is the opposite of want -it is caused by giving unconditionally -and that is only possible when the higher mind is harmoniously linked with the lower mind. If you ask Simple Simon why it is that so many healers practise at their own expense or for a pittance, he will simply say, ‘because they feel needed’. And the word feel means our personality self (the lower mind) benefits from that harmony. In last week’s post I said, ‘How do you tap into the source of higher wisdom to receive guidance? I answered that rhetorical question by saying it’s an act of faith. An act of faith is an act that promotes need. Is it easy? No -it’s not because we are educated to foster our survival instincts, and competitively to boot. To give without wanting something in return is an act of faith in the higher nature of yourself -it’s a self-healing action.

            The world we are living in right now is obstructing people’s wants wholesale, giving rise to fear on the one hand and frustration on the other, but it does have one redeeming virtue; it is causing people to re-examine their values. The outcomes won’t all be needful -you can be sure of that, but those who do get to the root of the problem will engage with life hereafter in a completely different way. Developing the feel of need is not just about aiding other people, however it is done, it is to any form of life you are drawn to express yourself to. The practise doesn’t require you to sign up to any given set of values, it’s not something you are required to confess to, it is materially zero cost, and doesn’t benefit from advertising. In short it is everything that is not expected of you.

            We are in week 12 of the lockdown -this number 12 is an important one when it comes to numerology since it signifies completion. It also belongs to the star sign Pisces known to be connected with the psychically aware. The number also represents the educational process on all soul levels, the submission of the will required and the sacrifice necessary to achieve knowledge and wisdom on both Spiritual and Intellectual levels. When the intellect is sacrificed to the feelings, the mind will be illuminated with the answers it seeks. In the Tarot the number 12 card is the Hanged Man, symbolic of self-sacrifice and meditation -when reversed it represents selfishness.

            Hopefully you will see the poem I have written for this week’s mail relates to what I have been saying.

My thanks to replies I receive -and everyone I reply too. The intention to recover and make a better world is a theme most often central to emails I receive. Stay healthy and you will stay safe. As always I include a link for the self-healing recording, feel free to pass it around to whomever you wish.


On being certain

To be certain, to know despite illusions’ evidence
the uniqueness of your border-less being,
is to love and know you are loved.
Inspiration-wise, is to be a love sword drawn,
a light cutting crystal, thrusting stars,
bursting dark loveless creations.

To be fatigued, to feel pain, to be angry with the world,
is to be instrument of an awesome force;
sensitive, naked, premature, and creative.
To know, what the have-nots seek to possess
is to be patient, responsive to the endless request,
knowing that love is an ever-open house.

To be certain, is to be without voice;
a timeless lover, the servant of causes; eunuch.
Is to have authority and no writ to prove it.
To love and be loved is magic much stronger than Man,
yet, it gently entreats pressing a rose in your hand.
And when you are certain, possessed of the force,

all Earth and life therein, constellations and universal sky,
shall become spoke and rim to your love of things,
of life in all its forms. And so, it is designed to be,
all hearts have their soul, in you.
And if this be not true,
then show me if you can, a better way.

This post refers to week 12 in the UK lockdown, first published on email 100620